My Therapist Suggested That I Consider Dating


My therapist suggested that I consider starting to date. My logical brain could not map out how we landed there. Three and a half years into my widow journey, dating is not a foreign thought. I stopped wearing my wedding ring six months after Raymond’s (my husband) untimely death. It became hard to deal with the perception of being married. For me, continuing to wear, or not wear, the ring did not mean that he was not in my heart anymore. It was a confusing thing for me. People that did not know me, assumed that I was a happily married woman with a child and I would be immersed into conversations or comments that would trigger me. The reality, at that time for me, was the opposite of the perception. I was widowed, sad, and single parenting. Every day, I would drop my son to school, go to work, and come home to an empty place that I didn’t know. Home was not always comfortable; pictures of the three of us in our happy family unit became unbearable. I can look at those pictures today and smile but having those family pictures all around my home just hurt me because that is NOT my life. The truth is those pictures no longer existed. And those pictures stay the same. Everything around us is changing and moving, but those pictures stayed the same. The longer my widow journey goes, the further away I am from the life in that picture.